Sporting ailments

I have been swimming quite frequently recently and have managed to get an ailment that, despite its cause, is called athletes foot. What with the Olympics and this ailment I started to wonder why some sports get labelled with particular ailments and not others. A few years ago I had a pain in my elbow and I thought “Aha,” tennis elbow. But when I saw a physio she said “No, that is golfers elbow”. Now, I do not play golf; in fact I get pretty close to despising it. So how come I have caught it? When I used to jog and took part in half marathons, never a full one (!), I seem to recall I heard about “runners nipple”. Just to check this out I Googled it and confirmed this is an appropriate term. Just in case someone finds this blog and is looking for a solution to this problem I can point them to a possible solution at http://www.nipguards.com which has this amazing testimony

Dear Nipguards: As both an avid runner and a member of the Pierced Nation, I must admit I had my doubts about your product. Normally I take my 4-inch hoop off my left nipple before running, but with the Nipguard in place I can get my exercise and show off my jewelry at the same time! And my bleeding has subsided to pre-pierced levels. Thanks, Nipguards! Sincerely, Norman Gardino Louisvile, Ky.

I guess if they work in this case…

There are obviously many sports that have been overlooked in having associated ailments and I offer a few possible novel ones below. But I would welcome more…

Footballer’s lip – a swelling caused by too much swearing and racial abuse. There could be a related ailment: Goalkeeper’s jaw. This is caused by excessive shouting at team mates and there was an apparently genuine incident when Alex Stepney, Manchester United goalkeeper, in a match against Birmingham in 1975 shouted so aggressively he dislocated his jaw.

Weightlifter’s hernia – too obvious

Tennis player’s throat – soreness caused by explosive grunting, closely related to tennis player’s ear afflicting the opposition

Less familiar to those in the UK would be baseball tummy – resulting from too casual ironing and another apparently genuine incident involving John Smoltz who wanting a really crisp shirt decided to iron it while he was wearing it, leading to scalding.

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1 Response to Sporting ailments

  1. Sophie says:

    Haha I have to say this is a great blog !!

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